My last vice
I think I'm going to give up caffeine. I'm not sure how this is going to work, since I've been pretty solidly caffeinated since about 1990. I think it makes my anxiety worse. And it dehydrates me.
I'm drinking a venti Awake tea from Starbucks right now, and my head is saying "What the fuck. YOU may call this caffeine, but you might as well be drinking some damn vitamin drink for all the good this is doing me." If I can make it through this headache, I may be able to make it to the roses and bunnies on the other side. Next maybe I'll give up gummies. And then Ambien. You may not even recognize me the next time you see me...I'll be the one glowing with health, or the effects of a raging migraine. Either way, I'll be squinting and cringing, because this is what the sun does to me, and the sun appears to be back for another round of summer happy happy joy joy, beckoning to the tank topped and the flip flopped of this town. Actually, here's who I'll be: the one on the widow's walk in my widows' weeds, spitting on them. Sorry, I just don't really like summer very much. It brings out the wizened divorcee in me.
Last night I dreamed that I was riding a flume ride, and every time the log went over a huge drop, I would fly up out of it, and a huge rubber band would snap me back into place.
I'm drinking a venti Awake tea from Starbucks right now, and my head is saying "What the fuck. YOU may call this caffeine, but you might as well be drinking some damn vitamin drink for all the good this is doing me." If I can make it through this headache, I may be able to make it to the roses and bunnies on the other side. Next maybe I'll give up gummies. And then Ambien. You may not even recognize me the next time you see me...I'll be the one glowing with health, or the effects of a raging migraine. Either way, I'll be squinting and cringing, because this is what the sun does to me, and the sun appears to be back for another round of summer happy happy joy joy, beckoning to the tank topped and the flip flopped of this town. Actually, here's who I'll be: the one on the widow's walk in my widows' weeds, spitting on them. Sorry, I just don't really like summer very much. It brings out the wizened divorcee in me.
Last night I dreamed that I was riding a flume ride, and every time the log went over a huge drop, I would fly up out of it, and a huge rubber band would snap me back into place.
posted by Julia Story at 6:37 AM
4 Comments:
Don't know what kind of quasi-Jehovah's Witness tea you're drinking, but I always rely on chai when I absolutely positively have to be vibrating by 8:00 am (though I'm aware that not everyone cottons to its pumpkin-eqsue flavor). Probably soothes the spoiled Yankee in me.
I will never give up caffeine. Do you hear me?! NEVER!!
There's this terrible path people get on...first it's the caffeine, then it's the sugar, and before you know it, all the pleasures of life are no-nos. I once asked my old sponsor, who gave up every fun, self destructive habit what she did when she felt rebellious. She said: I don't wear my seat belt.
sad, very sad.
(and you know, caffeine is connected to chocolate!)
I laugh out loud each time I think of Jehovah's Witness tea. I will try the chai tomorrow. I'm suddenly new age in many other ways; might as well do the tea also.
Lesblogs, please drink coffee forever. You're like in the coffee capitol--it would be a sin not to. And I won't give up bourbon (Maker's Mark forever and ever. amen.)
In the past year, I have discovered that there is an ineffable, nay sublime experience to be had in sipping Macallan's 15-year scotch. And before you go thinking that Nix has turned into one of those high-signifyin', cigar-savoring, foodie elitists, I submit to you my second drink order recently when there was no Macallan's to be had: "Uh, a kamikaze?" (My other second stringers are Cape Codders and White Russians, surely not the province of hard-drinking Marlboro Men, but more rather Aurora and Yuki's Tri-Delta Mixer stand-bys.) Not much hard likker I hanker for, but this is an exception.
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